Why job interviews are like first dates. Seven signs you’ll be seeing each other again

Sometimes you walk out of a job interview and you just know you’ve hit it off with the interviewer.  You have that sense of warmth like the job is a good fit. You can only think good things about the job, the interview and the employer.

A job interview that’s gone well is almost like a fun first date.

You think you genuinely got to know the other person and enjoyed their company.

I like the dating analogy, because when I take that a step further; I know that sometimes when people are super polite it’s hard to pick what they thought of me.

So if you’re like me and have left interviews wondering how it really went; the following Seven Signs may signal that you will be meeting again.

1) Like a good first date, the interviewer seems genuinely interested in uncovering what makes you tick. Sometimes they’ll keep probing when you have given succinct “overview” type answer . If the interviewer keeps digging for more information, asking for specifics of particular aspects of your answer it’s a great indicator that you have hit upon a skill or attribute skill that makes you a strong contender for the position. If they accept what you say and move on, then chances are you have answered the question to their satisfaction or you are in the process of being ruled out. Be warned here though, if the interviewer needs to continually dig about the same part of your answer you may have not answered the question properly, which may result in you being written off as “hard work”.

2) There’s some mirroring going on. In dating when people like each other they tend to mirror the body language of the other person. Same with job interviews, especially the “coffee chat” interviews, where you are not stuck behind a desk facing a panel.

3) You forget about the time. The job interview goes for much longer than you estimated. As a side note, you can often tell how much time the interviewer has allocated for a job interview by the time they invite you in. So if you are invited in at 9.45, say, it can mean that the interviewers are allocating either 30 or 45 minutes to the interview. If your job interview goes for longer than than the time you estimate, unless you or the interviewer are chronic “over-talkers”, the fact that the interview has gone over time, means you’ve all had a good time.

4) The interviewer asks about your salary expectations. I can’t think of an exact dating analogy for this, except this. If your interviewer asks you what your “expectations are” then you are being “qualified” for the role. Having said this, if the interviewer does not ask about what you want, money wise, this is not necessarily a bad sign about your success. Sometimes interviewers assume that you know what’s on offer, or that someone else will qualify you.

5) Your interviewer asks you about past references. Like dating, talking about relationships early on can be tricky territory. Unlike dating, if an interviewer checks that your referee relationships are still valid and asks for the best way to contact them, it means they think they’re onto a good thing.

6) The interviewer shares something about the company. Good job interviews, like good dates, are about sharing information. There are issues when the interviewer talks too much, but if an interviewer tells you nothing about a company, then there are a few explanations. They may want the job interview to end quickly or they are inexperienced/ poor interviewers. If the second scenario is the case, then you as an interviewee have every right to do your own due diligence on the role and check why it is on the market. Come to think of it, depending on what you want, you could possibly do the same of a date!

7) The interviewer contacts you quickly. Three things here. If a job is genuinely on the market, and the interviewer has their act together, and the interviewer genuinely likes you, you are likely to hear back pretty quickly. This is like dating. It does sound tough I know, but it’s a fact.

Fortunately though sometimes job interviews are not like dating because (for example) the key decision maker may not be the person you met.

So don’t give up even if you haven’t got all the Seven Signs, you may still be about to get some good news!

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