Career change advice to unhappy peeps. “You have to know what success means”

When I was miserable in my corporate job, I was stuck.

I couldn’t see anything I wanted to do at the company.

I couldn’t see anything else I wanted to do outside of it.

I was so lost that even if I had seen something I could have done, I don’t think I would have believed anyone would hire me.

Sounding familiar yet?

Let’s keep going, because I know you’ll relate to my story – and perhaps if you see yourself in it, you’ll see you can take some steps towards a happier ending.

One day our GM said to me I was one of only a few people in the company who could actually write!

via GIPHY

Surprised but inspired with that small insight, some inner drive made me decide to explore that idea further.

I remembered a former colleague who set up a recruitment magazine and asked her if I could meet her to find out more about what she did.

I was surprised when she said yes.

I didn’t know what I was going to talk to her about, but I landed at her doorstep and asked her about her magazine, why she set it up, and what she loved about it.

At the end of our conversation she asked me why I had come to meet her.

Put on the spot I simply said I was interested in writing.

She asked me if I wanted to write an article for her.

I was not expecting that. In fact I was blown away!

via GIPHY

Partly because I did not 100% believe I was a good writer, and partly because I thought my ex-colleague would see right through what felt a bit like a whimsical thought-bubble I was exploring.

My first article for her wasn’t so great.

I was trying to impress her audience with research facts and academic language. But my ex-colleague was kind enough to point this out and let me have another crack.

She ended up offering me paid writing work.

Now this could have been the happy beginning and a fast track to a fulfilling new career.

But it wasn’t.

It took me about 3 more years to fully exit my old job as I went round in circles trying different things.

via GIPHY

The other day I sat down and thought hard about why that happened.

At that point, I could have created more writing opportunities for myself, if I had followed that same process of meeting someone in the know.

This would have helped me find a new career I enjoyed and was good at – that sweet spot career coaches like me tell you to aim for.

But I didn’t.

And the reason I didn’t is that I did not know what success looked like.

I did not know that I just had a successful meeting.

I did not know this kind of networking was one of the most effective ways to change careers.

I did not know I should have kept on arranging similar meetings.

 

via GIPHY

The list of what I did  not know goes on and on.

I did not know that it was a great thing to explore what I was curious about.

I did know know I did not have to be an expert to get started on that exploration.

I did not know that out of these meetings could come opportunities I could build upon, or even job offers.

I did not know that I was re-building my confidence by finding someone who believed in me.

There are a few reasons I didn’t know I was successful and to keep replicating that process of reaching out. Ultimately it was a lack of self-confidence.

Innately I believed the success of that first meeting was a fluke and I think deep down I was worried about having to prove myself as worthy if someone else said yes to meet me.

So how did that lack of confidence come about?

It came from within and externally from a workplace that reinforced that.

Without even realising it I was really hard on myself and I did not think I was good enough. I’d forgotten who I was and what I was capable of.

I had been bullied and undermined at work, which had reinforced my sense of unworthiness.

Truth be known I’d never received much positive feedback, let alone outright praise at work – or anywhere else in my life.

In my mind I was focussed on trying to understand why I was being undermined at work. I was not doing something far more productive – which was thinking about who I was and what could make me happy.

I’m telling you this story not for the sake of talking about myself.

But to tell you that if you’re experiencing something like this, you’re not alone.

I see this in my clients all the time.

Cr*p at work can reinforce any negative self belief you’ve internalised until it becomes so much part of your identity it’s hard to see that you have no self belief – let alone question if that negative belief about yourself is true.

What would have been super helpful at this time is a career/job search coach.

A coach to not just help me unpack my success stories BUT to actually believe these were true.

A coach to help me identify what I could really market about myself as unique.

A coach to show me what actions to take that would re-build my confidence.

A coach to help me find people who would see me for what I was AND believe in me more than I did in myself at that time.

A coach who could help me keep going to understand which knockbacks were because of things I could control, and which knockbacks were because of things I could not.

A coach to remind me that I was strong enough and good enough to make that next move.

If you’re struggling to make your move, you don’t have to settle for a situation that will never serve you. The work you’re trying to do to make a career or job change is SUPER hard work to do on your own.

Here’s my advice.

Know that you’re worthy of coaching and get some outside help.

via GIPHY

That could start with a counsellor, a psychologist, a career counsellor or me.

We can all help with different things.

I have two ways I set my clients up for success.

I offer a small group career change coaching program called the Straight to Shortlist Challenge.

It’s for people who want to something different – that might be a step up, a change of career or a step sideways or back.

On the challenge you’ll take practical steps to change your career direction. I show you how to rediscover what you’re good at, then find and meet people who believe in you and can offer you great career advice, opportunities or even jobs.

The wonderful thing many people discover doing this challenge is that only good people say yes to a meeting them.

They discover these are good people who appreciate what it takes to make an approach AND see people who do so as positive and proactive!

If I had done something like this when I was wanting to change career it would have happened a whole lot faster.

Check out the Straight to Shortlist Challenge here.

You won’t be doing this alone. You’ll also have me as coach each week, and be in a group of like-minded professionals.

The second way I help is working 1:1 with you on your CV/LinkedIn profile. We go over all your career history and reflect on challenges you have overcome, what you’ve been proud of delivering and what success means.

While I am looking at what the company considers valuable, I ALSO look far beyond that at whether the market sees something as valuable AND you see it as valuable.

We also look at things you’ve done outside of work and what they say about you.

I reflect back the strengths I see, which are always more than you will see.

At this point many people have big “AH HA” moments – in that they suddenly recognise talents in themselves.

Check out my CV and packages here.

If you’d like to find out more about these programs and how I can help you – book a FREE 15 minute career check in with me here.

If I can leave you with one thing, please know this.

Whatever package choose to do with me, you’ll find me as invested in your success as you are.

I’m looking forward to seeing you on the other side.

Karalyn