Make “Selfish” Work for Your Job Hunt

by K B , updated on May 20, 2016

photo (29)It’s great to welcome another guest author to InterviewIQ, Ashley Lauren Perez, who has written an inspiring blog for everyone whose confidence has taken a battering from their work or job hunting.

Ashley is currently using her human resources and creative writing background to write a blog for managers, leaders, employees and job seekers.

Her mission is to make a positive difference by being informative as well as inspiring.

There’s a link to Ashley’s blog at the bottom of this blog, but firstly over to you Ashley…..

Recently, a group of my friends and I were discussing our work situations.

Some of us have had some really great circumstances but the majority of us had horror stories.

These ranged from unexpected lay-offs, bullying bosses that killed our confidence, black balling and managers lying to us about the job description so they can pay us less.

Some of us were able to find new opportunities while the rest of us just felt stuck.

But are we really?

After that conversation I recalled something I wrote from two years ago regarding the cut-throat business mentality that seemed to dominate the area I grew up.

I was tired of being surrounded by selfish “Machiavellian” type people. However to my dismay I soon discovered that I could not escape those scenarios because they are everywhere.  At that point I made a choice. I would stop allowing myself to be the victim. I needed to be selfish but in the right way.

I decided there was a type of selfish that was fine.  It’s to be selfish for you.

Sometimes you need to put yourself first for once as long as it doesn’t take advantage of other people.

I started to care about myself and because of that things changed for the better. I’m actually proud of the things I’ve accomplished because I finally allowed myself the chance to achieve them. With each accomplishment came an increased sense of self-worth.

I became self-assured and felt that I was someone worthy of great things and that I had more to offer.  That I am more than average!

With that I was able to take away the following life lessons.

  • I believed that I could do anything I wanted if I tried hard enough to make it happen.
  • I ensured that no one could make me doubt my abilities or question if I was good enough.
  • I was able to handle life’s curve balls. I now know how to take things for what they are, figure out a solution, be proactive and move along.
  • I realised that when something goes wrong, one of two things will happen. I can let the situation control me or I can determine the end result.
  • When I feel that I’ve hit a brick wall I can find ways to get around it even if it takes a bit more effort.
  • I learned that sometimes life doesn’t just hand me things. If all the doors of opportunity are closed then I need to create my own passageway.

It wasn’t until I finally took the time to care about myself that I realised not all selfishness is bad.

This way of living has helped me become a better version of myself and in turn allows me to offer the best I can to those around me.

I know that many of you out there have had rough situations like the ones mentioned earlier.

I know there are also plenty of you that are burnt out and beat up from lost job opportunities and dead-end interviews. Rejection after rejection can be hard on your confidence.

But you can’t let that define who you are. Don’t portray a lesser version of yourself just because you’re going through a rough patch.

Make the time to get your self-confidence back.

That way you’ll be able to put your best foot forward in your next interview.

Take a break from checking the job boards and take some time to build yourself back up.  Building that confidence could allow you to handle the set-backs better and know how to react in a way that can bounce you back in a favorable direction.

I believe that you can find what’s right for you if you try these suggestions.

  • Break out of your comfort zone: go to local meet-and-mingle events for professionals with the sole intention of learning more about the businesses in your surrounding area.
  • Be a socialite: talk to anyone about anything. Everyone (no matter how successful or not) can teach you something. You may be pleasantly surprised at the new insight you gain.
  • Get virtual: join professional networking sites and contribute to discussion boards in various groups. You can learn more about business and expand knowledge by talking to professionals throughout the world.
  • Take time to do something you love: only focusing on the job search can create stress that hinders your productivity.  Take a break and do something you love to break up the search stress.
  • Reward yourself: most job seekers beat themselves up over their unemployment or underemployment. However you’re makingan effort in the right direction. Reward yourself for working hard. Trust me – you’ve earned it!
  • Try something that interests you: too often we focus on what we have done before rather than what we’ve always wanted to do. Give it a shot- take a class, watch an instructional video or read a “how-to” blog/book. You could discover you’re better at something new rather than something you’ve been doing for years.  This will really boost your confidence by reminding you that life is about growth and learning.
  • Realise it’s never too late to switch gears: the world is full of options.  It’s also full of resources to obtain the experience and education you need to pursue those options.  It’s never too late to switch career paths.  There’s always a way to do it, so do your research.
  • Put yourself out there and take chances: if playing it safe isn’t getting you the response you need (or any response at all) then you need to try a new tactic.  Take a chance, try something new, get exposure and put your all into it.  People respect others who show courage.  You may be able to catch the attention of the right people because of it.

Right now I don’t know what the future holds for me. However I’m confident that taking the time to do these things will be paving the way to the greatest future possible.

I’ve been granted a new sense of hope for my future and I welcome you to grant yourself that as well.

You can read more of Ashley’s pearls of wisdom at ashleylaurenperez.

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K B

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